1:30 Rachel Luna’s Story
Rachel grew up with not much confidence with what she called “false confidence” and lived in that cycle. She looked the part but deep down she was struggling with alcoholism and two eating disorders. She remembers being the shortest in her class and having to always really yell to be seen and be heard. Her insecurities took her down a path that was just no meant for her. After lots of meaningless sex with the same people which was caused from a where she didn’t value herself, she experienced low Self Esteem, struggled with anxiety and severe depression.
She woke up one day and realised that this was not the kind of woman she wanted to nor was raised to be and something had to change.
In an attempt to try and figure out the patterns of her destructive behaviour, she hired a life coach. At this time she was in a lot of debt, at her highest possible weight.
One thing that is very important to Rachel is integrity –she wanted to be a woman of her word even though she didn’t always necessarily live up to that. Her Life Coach during her sessions told Rachel that she would make a great life coach.It made sense as in the fourth and fifth grade, some of her classmates referred to her as “Oprah,” for the way she gave advice. It was that life coach that planted the seed that maybe this life was a possibility for her. She lost the weight from changing her mindset, self worth and value perspective.
She became a certified Life Coach at a time where people were not even talking about Life Coaching. Even though people thought she was crazy, she just knew she had to help people. Rachel found that she liked Life Coaching for Entrepreneurs in particular as they were driven more than the average individual. A lot of the feedback from her clients was that the result they received from her was confidence. She worked on her own confidence and mindset.
One thing that’s common amongst entrepreneurs is what she calls a “Paralysis moment,” And the first thing to do is to recognize that you’re in paralysis
11:49 Working through your Paralysis moment
To take you through the steps of working through a paralysis, Rachel uses Kamila’s recent launch experience where things didn’t go as planned.
Feeling Like A Fraud.
Whether we are Oprah or Tony Robbins, it is natural human instinct to feel like a fraud when results don’t happen the way that we expected them to. Everyone struggles with that no matter what level they are at – even at the mastery level. We exercise this behaviour because we want people to know that we are the expert and to not lose faith in us. Dispel the myth, It will attack us at some point or another no matter what we have accomplished.
14:10 Before The Paralysis
Kamila tried to analyse what happened – and why things didn’t go the way she planned. Analysing helps to identify patterns of what worked and what didn’t to ensure for the next time, these can be improved upon or avoided. What happens from here is, because Kamila is a strategist, her mind clicks over to the, “how can I make the money that I thought I could,” and her mind occupies with a thousand ideas and how to execute them. Rather than going out an executing them, she falls into a paralysis.
Rachel explains that this happened because Kamila didn’t go back to examine the facts around the deep rooted thought and fear that she had was “I’m a fraud, I’m not good enough.:
I am not good enough is the number one limiting belief that every single human being has on the planet. It manifests in it’s different ways. You can call it whatever you want but at the core, the belief is, I am not good enough.
16:43 Facts Around The Launch
The Fact Is she had over 1,000 people sign up for the launch.
The Fact is she had over 300 people live per day.
17:40 Meaning & Story
Rachel asks Kamila what story and meaning she gave to the facts.
“I didn’t hit my goal,” was the thought and the story. The feelings and emotions that came up with that were disappointment and anxiety driven hopefulness.
Because she didn’t reach her goal, even though 1,000 people signed up, she told herself that “There’s not enough.” This attaches the energy of lack of abundance into the entire launch sequence. So everything she was going to do going forward, there would be this underlying lack that it wasn’t enough.
The next fact “300 People Showed Up Live,” Kamila told herself the story
More subconscious stories deployed from “I thought it wasn’t going to be terrible,”
The story she told herself was that “I know based on the numbers, we’re not going to make it.”
21:16 A fact during Kamila’s paralysis that she missed “We changed the time. My audience is an evening attendance type person.”
“When I do what I want, when I do what’s best for me – people don’t show up.”
“I have to change what I want to do to accommodate other people.”
To break apart these stories – The facts actually were:
- Kamila had things to do so she could only do it at that time
- She only wanted to do it at that time
- She wanted to build a business the way she wanted it to be and the fact is, they just didn’t show up.
All brand new facts where you can tell brand new stories.
When you have this recognition in the paralysis cycle, the fact is:
I am worthy
I have launched many times
Attendance was low because I changed the time
It’s not a reflection of my worth
It’s not a refleiciton of my contribution, service or program.
The only thing this mean, based on the facts, people couldn’t show up at that time.
24:36 Belief in Entrepreneurs
Humans don’t believe people enough. And we also don’t believe ourselves at all. This is why consistency is such a big problem for entrepreneurs as this lack of belief is letting you down.
Deep down, if we can’t trust ourselves, we can’t trust other people.
Take what people say to you at face value. At Truth.
If you start to operate in your truth, then you’ll start to see and attract more truthful people that you can count on.
25:58 Rachel Luna’s Book
A book that challenges to make massive shifts in your self awareness,
perspectives, relationships, in your business and the way you communicate with yourself and other people.
26:05 The Cycle of False Confidence
The premise is that most of us have lived our lives operating from the cycle of false confidence which says we take courageous action not confident action. We are expecting a result, positive or negative and
no matter what that result is, we find yourself in a state of paralysis because we are seeking joy as a result of the result.
When we take action and a result happens, we expect joy and fulfilment are waiting for us there.
28:55 The Cycle Of True Confidence
You take courageous action with a confident mindset and that confident mindset is assuring you that no matter what happens, it is safe for me to operate from a place of joy and fulfilment right here and right now. And when I get there, which becomes here, no matter the result, I’m not going to die and it’s safe for me to keep going.
You’re able to look at the entire journey of getting you from here to there and recognize that you have been in a state of joy and fulfilment along the way, so you didn’t really lose anything. In fact, what you’ve done is gained wisdom, lessons, power and strength so that you can continue. Our brain is programed to keep us alive. We think that everything we do can potentially kill us. When you have the confident mindset you know that the chances of you launching or partaking in any business activity and dying are super super slim.
People think that enjoying fear means that you can’t feel the emotions that are associated with fear.
Get aware. Get Present. Separate the fact from the story
When we are scared or experiencing fear, we add certain elements that eventually paralyse us.
39:02 Keep Up To Date with Rachel
Get your free 20 page guide of a profitable To Do List. It comes with an audio that walks you through basically how to set your days up so that you are taking inspired, confident action to make more money.
Stay tuned for the release of her new book Girl, Confident.
“There is here.”
“My happiness, joy and fulfilment are not dependent on the result of my action. My happiness, joy and fulfilment come from taking the action.”
“Enjoy every step of the Journey”
“If I try to save someone while I’m drowning, I’m going to drown.”
“Admitting that you’re scared actually brings you so much peace.”
“I am not good enough is the number one limiting belief that every single human being has on the planet. It manifests in it’s different ways. You can call it whatever you want but at the core, the belief is, I am not good enough.”